Kissing Cousins

I though it would be funny if while you were in the bathroom, I told the bartender we were brother and sister.

Haha.

Get it? No?

Ugh! Why do I always end up having to explain my jokes?!?

It’s funny because were not!

Plus I knew it would be a smart idea. Because when you put your hand up my skirt right in front of everyone, even the owner was too horrified to tell us to stop.

I love getting my way and I will make sure I always get it, no matter who I have to shock, hurt, or humiliate.

I’m also a pathological liar- but since that has never gotten in my way of scoring with random men at bars, I’ll just gloss over it. Hey, you look like your just bulging right out of those tight, tight pants! (flash a winning smile until he forgets).

Was I surprised when the three burly bouncers rushed up behind you, pulled you off of me, threw you to the ground, and started kicking you in the balls?

Not really. You’d be surprised how often that kind of thing tends to happen!

I was surprised when the cops showed up, though… hmm.

God, I love you (not like a brother, so don’t get confused)! So, I really hope that we can do this again sometime, but that is also why I can’t come down there and bail you out of jail. See, I'm not your sister. And it’s high time you stopped treating me like one.