Dear Blog Idol

Dear Blog Idol,

Please give me the strength to write another blog article this week. Please make the article funny and/or interesting enough so that the few who read it may stay on my webpage for 5 minutes or longer, consequently increasing the size of the orange slice on my Statcounter.com “Visit Length” pie-graph.

And please, Blog Idol, if you have the time, grant me my one true wish: that I should become the richest and most seemingly intellectual of all the bloggers in all the blog community! But, if you can’t give me the manic fame and fortune so many other successful bloggers enjoy, could you at least send a few new readers my way? Or even one very devoted fan. At this point, I’m not picky.

Oh! Blog Idol, think me not desperate, when really I am just really lazy. Or maybe tired. Either way, I now appeal to you to make my dreams come true for me without much effort on my behalf.

For these favors, I will continue to pay my monthly dues of $19.95. Thank you, Blog Idol. Thank you for freeing me of any personal responsibility whatsoever.

-Samantha